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It’s ok if you don’t feel like working

Work won't love you back book cover by sarah jaffe

This time of year in the northern hemisphere feels right to go inside, to feel, a dreaming time. 

How can you respect seasonal living in yourself?

If you don’t feel like working, you are not alone.

Maybe you’re supposed to be dreaming right now.

You are more than just checkmarks on a to-do list.

You don’t have to have it all figured out right now.

You get to feel and rest and breathe and dream.

That is what I wish for you this month.

Consider this… Slowdown your slowdown

What does your intuition tell you?

How can you allow your intuition a bigger place in your life?

This is how we deprogram from the larger culture that wants us to keep consuming, rushing, not taking time to stop and feel.

What’s behind our rushing?

And sometimes we’re rushing because we don’t want to feel grief. 

My friend Natalya has been talking with me about grief lately, and how Americans turn away from it. How she is turning towards it as this Ukraine war drags on.

I feel like I turned towards grief for the first time last year. I cried uncontrollably as I started realizing I couldn’t have the relationships I wanted with people in my family.

But i kept delving and trying harder to feel my grief. I interviewed Kierra Taplin about grief, here.

Here’s something I didn’t realize about feelings.

My therapist told me that on average, a feeling lasts 20-30 seconds, and then we’re on to the next feeling.

That made me understand I could show up for my own feelings, as well as hold a container for other people’s feelings, and just let them be. It doesn’t take that long to let them move through, to just accept and hold space.

Last night I sat with my friend and let her cry. We pointed out our feelings on the feelings wheel. (I’ve been making fridge magnets out of these and giving them to people, and people love them.)

On the other side of grief is joy.

What do you need to grieve today?

Whether you are feeling joy or grief or something else, I’m here, dreaming in the dark too.

Mazarine

p.s. This originally appeared in my newsletter. If you’d like to get notes like this, from me, plus jokes, then subscribe here:

p.s. In Case You Missed It (ICYMI)
–  My mistakes of 2022
–  Check out this cool anger iceberg graphic!
–  Why do you have to label it?
–  Top 9 books of 2022

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Mazarine

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